Letting your Cat pick your Mate?

So I started dating this guy a little over a month ago, and the biggest surprise thus far in our relationship is how well he gets along with the cats in my household. I know that there are people out there that truly are "cat people", and it reinforces my belief that animals, especially cats, are able to key in on whether someone is a good or bad person. It seems as though I have noticed a few areas in which my cats try to gauge whether or not my new beau is worthy of their attention. Those are a) his playfulness b) his attentiveness and c) his ability to be trained. As much as you may be thinking that it is I who is sizing my new boyfriend within these categories, but I assure you... really, it's just my cats.

Case in point #1 Chainsaw vs. Tom*


I have a cat named Chainsaw. Yes, Chainsaw. I bet you're picturing a large sabre-toothed long haired prehistoric beast looking cat. In fact she weighs 6 lbs., is soft like a Chinchilla, orange and white, with black arm bands, white socks, and adorably cute pink paw pads and matching pink nose. Why you ask do we call her the Chainsaw? She is two-faced. She has a light side on one side, and a dark side on the other. Most of the time, the light side is out, but occasionally she lets the dark side take reign...and that's when the Chainsaw Massacre can happen.

When Chainsaw is not in her "chainsaw" mode, she enjoys playing in her tent, fetching her noodle, or doing drive-bys, oh and the ever entertaining "spider-cat" routine.

Chainsaw can be a tough little cookie, when she's nipped out, or wild-eyed.... but really, she's a scaredy cat who hates the vacuum. So, whenever a new person comes over, it takes her a very very very long time for her to warm up to them.

Not with Tom. It took her about 2 weeks of him coming over fairly regularly for her to come out to meet him. By week 3 they were playing noodle together.... by week 4 she was letting him pick her up and cuddle (a little). It's amazing... and I think it's because she trusts him and can sense that he is a truly cat person.

He's very good about making sure to play with her when she's in the mood to play.

Case in Point #2 Tom Vs. Mary Jane

There's only so much in-and-out one can handle. Can Tom be trained? Mary Jane says Yes! Mary Jane is my half Siamese half Norweigan Forrest cat that meeyangs instead of meows. Everyone loves her. She's the type of cat who goes over to the neighbor's apartment, just to keep them company. She's the type of cat that greets you when you come home by jumping on the hood of your car and meeyanging at you until you get out to greet her. She's awesome. She's also a pain. She constantly wants to either be let inside or outside, which she tells you by scratching on the door...specifically while you are either a) watching your favorite TV show or b) in the middle of something extremely important.

So, how does she test him, and make sure she is willing to feed her and/or let her in and/or out whenever she pleases? Just like any other cat would.... any time he gets up and goes near the door, she runs over and meeyangs. Or she goes into the kitchen and meeyangs. Or she scratches on the door until he lets her in... is he doing this out of politeness, or annoyance?Both?

 

So far as I have seen, Tom really likes my cats, and my cats really like Tom.

I'm starting to trust my cats instincts about this guy... especially after how they felt about the last one... and that's a WHOLE different story.

*names have been changed to protect identities

Sabertooths Are The Greatest!

When I was a kid I loved going to the La Brea Tar Pits in Los Angeles. The sabertooths were my favorite. 

 

People always used to call them sabertooth tigers but then I found out that they weren't really tigers. The preferred nomenclature is "saber-toothed cat." Kinda dorky, but the animal is still wicked cool. 

 

Check out these teeth!

Photo from http://www.nps.gov/hafo/naturescience/sabertooth-cat.htm

UK Cat Lands Career as Hypnotherapist

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“You’re getting very—mreow—sleepy… You want to give me your shoes to vomit in as I please—mreow… You suddenly want to let me have my way with the goldfish, shed all over your favorite jacket and use your mattress as a scratching post…”

If cats could hypnotize us, we’d all be in trouble. They already have the entire family under their control to some extent in most households, and if there’s anything that a cat wants most, it’s world domination—and, according to Disney, the baby’s milk.

(Does it seem to you that they have a bit of a bias against cats? Sure, they tried to redeem themselves a bit in The Aristocats, but most other Disney felines seem like they’re evil compared to Disney dogs.)

And as much as I’m against using cats in animal testing—particularly those heinous studies in which kittens’ eyes are sewn shut to test cosmetics and such—I have to admit this test was pretty funny.

George, a lovely orange tabby from the UK, was recently used in an experiment of sorts. In order to prove that the regulation for hypnotherapists in the country is too slack, Chris Jackson, the presenter of Inside Out, registered George as a hypnotherapist.

Three industries accepted the cat’s credentials, which included a fake certificate from the Society of Certified Advanced Mind Therapists. To understand just how fake these credentials are, one should know that such a society does not even exist.

That’s pretty bad.

Such lax regulations are also happening in the United States. Dr. Steve Eichel, who suspected that organizations in America were not checking the backgrounds and credentials of prospective hypnotherapists either, got his own cat certified by many industries as well. “It was a frighteningly simple process,” he admits.

George the cat himself was recognized as a certified hypnotherapist by the United Fellowship of Hypnotherapists, the British Board of Neuro Linguistic Programming, and the Professional Hypnotherapy Practitioner Association.

And though the organizations made their atonements and excuses—one saying it’s since corrected the error, another saying it basically did its best, and a third claiming that they don’t have to check credentials, only provide benefits—it’s still pretty laughable that a cat was able to pass through so easily.

If you’re in the market for a good hypnotherapist, you might want to do a bit of background checking on your own since the Board isn’t about to do it for you. You could get saddled with some creep right out of prison with no other credentials than knowing the hypnotic refrain of The Cell Block Tango. Of course, if you’d rather be hypnotized by a cat, more power to you. 

I Have Decided To Start Acting Like A Cat, Signed: Your Roommate

Hey. You're not busy, are you? You are? Yeah, I'm feeling kinda lonely and needy right now, so I'm still gonna bug you. Are you listening? How about now? Hey, pay attention to me. Okay, now that you're paying attention to me I've lost all interest in you. I'm gonna go over here now and take a nap, but I'll be back later when I want something.

You see what you just did there? You woke me up from my nap with the sound of your typing, so naturally I must exact my revenge. I hope you haven't become too attached to this particular copy of Pride and Prejudice because it's totally mine now and believe me, I've got plans for it. Chapters 5 and 7 shall henceforth be stricken from the volume since I feel compelled to chew on them, while a portion of Chapter 6 seems fit to sharpen my nails. I bet you wish you wouldn't have typed so loud now.

Alright, all of that destruction worked up quite a hunger in me. You should be prepared to meet my specific demands for dinner. I'll assume you can read my thoughts concerning this subject. Should you give me something other than what I happen to desire at the exact moment when you bring me the food, I will roundly refuse it and catalog that particular failure for future retribution.

Ahem, you may or may not have noticed that I have a nagging itch on this spot I could easily scratch myself. No, not there, or there. Damn it, do I have to do everything myself? Look, just move your fingers in a scratching motion and I'll position myself wherever I happen to need the service. Useless, you're just useless. Ooh, that feels nice, though. Hey, why'd you stop? Don't tell me I'm going to have to ask that very same question ten times in succession, because I'm prepared to do just that.

Excuse me, would you mind letting me investigate what's behind this door? Yes, I'm aware I've been in there many, many times before and there was nothing at all interesting to be found. And yes, I also recall that the last time I went in there something gave me quite a profound scare, but that doesn't change anything. You see, I really must go in there right now. It's the principle of the matter. You're not going to let me in this time? Fine. It's your funeral.

I'm going to bathe myself in front of you while you eat. You won't mind, I'm sure. When I'm done I'll probably do my usual nightly routine. You know, roll around the floor just 'cuz, maybe sit at the window plotting the excruciating death of that blasted squirrel who has had the unbelievable gall to poke around in my tree, then probably have a treat or two. By the by, you should probably have those treats at the ready.

*Yawn* I have had just the hardest day. Really, no one has ever suffered as much as me. What, you're not going to comfort me? Monster. Not a single soul in this cruel world understands me. It's a cold, harsh place, this life. Speaking of cold, I've noticed you have some excess body warmth, so I'm going to put it to good use. No, I don't care if you're busy. Don't move a muscle, I'm just about as comfortable as I could possibly be right now. Oh, I am just the most adorable thing that ever did exist. Confirm that. Again. Thank you.

Halloween + Crazy Cat People = Cats in Pathetic Costumes

By far, the craziest breed of pet owner has to be the feline fanatic. I mean, what other pet owners have their own class of crazy attributed to them(as well as their own action figure!)? And Crazy Cat Lady Syndrome is no joke!

What's really baffling is that in their obsession with their cats, Crazy Cat People will do the weirdest things to these innocent, yet useless animals. Don't believe me? Check out these cats in costume. These cats don't look amused or cute in the costumes made by, or picked by their misguided and possibly unstable owners.

 

Cat Costume Horrors!

 

 

 

 

 

 

This Halloween, remember, cats deserve respect and dignity too.

 

What I've Learned About Cats

Both my mother and my brother were allergic to cats when I was growing up. Consequently, I never spent much time around the animals. Recently I moved into a new apartment with a friend who has two cats, so I've started to learn about them in something of a crash course. Here's what I've learned about Felis Catus since switching residences.

1. Dogs, they certainly are not

Just because I didn't experience cats in my childhood doesn't mean that I never had a pet. In fact, my family adopted a lovable mutt who lived among us for nearly 15 years. I got very used to handling dogs, which I've discovered is considerably easier than cohabiting with a cat. Dogs and humans evolved together and we bred them specifically to be our animal companions. So, dogs are possessed of a few things cats simply don't have. Take, for instance, a proper language center in their brains. Dogs can recognize a small vocabulary of words and happen to have a disposition that wants to respond to them favorably. Dogs are creatures of service and obedience. Cats, on the other hand, have no means of comprehending language beyond tone and they have very little incentive to actually do as humans please.

 

2. Cats, despite the above, attempt to converse

Dogs bark when something needs to be brought to a human's attention. Cats meow when a human's attention needs to be brought to the cat itself. Cats announce themselves and plead for care. I find this a bit disconcerting, receiving social communication from a creature with no thumbs.

 

3. Cats are strangely thoughtful and thoughtfully strange

In the past two and a half weeks, I have witnessed a cat meow at a closed bathroom door for an hour straight, demand attention only to become aloof the instant it's granted and gaze out a window in a regal pose at absolutely nothing. I have resigned myself to the reality that cats, or at least the ones that live with me, have thought patterns that are far more esoteric and eccentric than one might imagine coming from a creature with no primate brain structure. This is both charming and reliably bizarre.

 

4. Cats are not pets, they are house guests

A friend of mine used this particular phrase several years ago, but I didn't understand it until now. Cats do not conceive of themselves as being creatures of dependence or service. At best, they recognize that the humans among them are authorities or highly proficient equals. Like a house guest, a cat is only as courteous as it needs to be. Give a cat unhindered freedom and it will most certainly exercise it. Establish firm limits and it might just come to an understanding with you.

 

I can't exactly say that I am or ever will be a "cat person". I can't imagine myself ever adopting one on my own. Still, being able to interact with domestic cats is a useful skill and I feel that much more capable having shared a space with the animals.

Show Your Cat How Much You Care

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Taking care of cats is pretty simple, right? You change the litter box, you feed them every day, and you take them to the vet, and give them a little time and affection. Unlike many dogs, most cats are generally pretty self-reliant. You give them the basics, and they’re pretty much on their own.

But that doesn’t mean that Princess and Boots don’t want your attention. No matter how aloof or snobbish any cat may seem, deep down he or she loves you and wants your affection. (That’s not to say that some cats aren’t open about it in the first place; there are plenty of loving, purr-able cats who aren’t shy when it comes to demanding attention!)

To many cat owners, cats are members of the family. So why not treat them as such? Here are some things you can do to help show your cat how much you love her.

Supply plenty of cat toys. Balls, stuffed mice, catnip-filled fish, you name it—he or she wants it! Even if you think Fluffy has no interest in toys at all, you might be able to find just the right one that will tickle her fancy. We had one cat who only wanted to play with a certain striped ball—she would have no other! Another likes long sticks with string, ribbon and anything dangly attached to it. Try using your imagination and making something for your feline.

Stay current on the litter. Nobody likes to walk in a pile of poo—cats included! Keep the litter box clean for your furry friend.

Buy pet insurance. You might scoff at this, but many places sell it at a reasonable cost that will save you money. Some clinics even offer wellness plans that cover shots and exams.

Provide scratching posts. Don’t scold Stripes for clawing up the couch if he doesn’t have something to relieve those nails on! Get him a couple of scratching posts—one in each of his favorite rooms—and he’ll probably start to leave the furniture alone.

Give cat treats. Don’t overfeed, but don’t be stingy, either! We usually give one treat a day to help with teeth health, and the cats know by the sound of the container shaking it’s time to eat.

Spend time with your cat. We often take it for granted that our cats are so independent, they don’t really need us; but a little petting and playing every day helps keep them bonded to us and happy.

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